When I first sat down to write this post, I began to list all of the amazing things I learned and people I met while helping grow Lean In Canada to what it is today. I must admit that I had a moment of panic when I realized I might not be able to cover it all in one short blog post. So much happened in 5 years.
5 whole years. That’s 1,825 days of diving in head first, adapting, evolving, challenging myself, and learning. I wouldn’t be surprised if I learned something new every day.
But then it hit me. Everything that I learned while at Lean In Canada—pretty much all of it—fits under this one beautiful piece of advice: Be comfortable with the uncomfortable.
Feeling terrified? Do it anyway. New territory? Fake it ‘til you make it. Want to run and hide? Strut your stuff instead.
Lean In Canada event
Here’s the thing, we are all confronted with challenges throughout our lives and in our careers. And it usually comes down to these two options: give up, or embrace the uncomfortable and keep on keepin’ on. During my time as Co-Founder and National Director at Lean in Canada, I certainly learned to embrace the uncomfortable. And you know what? It led to success. Every. Single. Time.
Below are some examples of how this played out for me over the years. Hopefully it gives you some ideas of how you can apply this philosophy to your life.
“Leave the comfortable and wander out into the unknown.” -Paulette Senior, President & CEO, Canadian Women’s Foundation
Network like nobody’s watching.
If we met over the last 6 years, you’ll probably be surprised to learn that I used to be absolutely terrified of networking. If it weren’t for the constant encouragement of my mentor, the beauty of networking, and a little bit of luck, Lean In Canada may not have benefitted from a very generous sponsorship opportunity.
Networking is all about making connections. I’m good at that part. It’s just the first part (approaching a complete stranger) that can be a little scary. But because I stepped outside of my comfort zone to face that particular fear, I met Maureen Doolub, the woman who would (years later) introduce us to Proctor and Gamble, a client of hers who was looking to sponsor a woman’s organization. And do you know what this one little connection resulted in? $50,000. Suddenly, we had the financial freedom to build an empire.
“Good mentors will throw you out of your comfort zone but give you a soft landing.” -Judi Hughes, Co-Founder, Your Planning Partners
Growth means you can’t do it all. (So surround yourself with an amazing team.)
It probably won’t come as a surprise when I tell you that the success of Lean In Canada was thanks to the amazing women I co-founded the organization with: Christina Rupsingh and Sarah Kwan. For the first three years of Lean In Canada’s life, I’m not exaggerating when I say that the three of us DID IT ALL: Events, Marketing, Planning, Membership, Sponsorship, Expansion, Financial, Legal. You name it, we did it.
Lean In Canada Co-Founders
At some point, it became clear to us that in order to grow, we had to learn to let go. To delegate. After that realization, one of our biggest accomplishments was to create our Board of Directors, and to recruit a number of talented, passionate women who shared our mission. So that we could finally take a step back, reflect… and breathe.
Letting go was uncomfortable (it’s not easy to take something you built out of nothing — your baby — and put it in someone else’s hands, no matter how capable they happen to be), but it was critical to our growth as an organization… and it was good for our personal growth too.
It’s okay to toot your own horn.
Something Vandana Juneja, Senior Director at Catalyst Inc., said during her talk back in April 2017 has stuck with me ever since. I’m paraphrasing, but it goes something like this: The two ways to get ahead as a woman are by: (1) networking, and (2) having the ability to toot your own horn.
Not surprisingly, the latter makes me feel super uncomfortable to this day. (Hey, we’ve all read the articles—downplaying our achievements is part and parcel of being a woman.) But it’s true, we need to be able to share our accomplishments with the world without shame. Even more importantly, we need to stop minimizing them, or worse, let someone else take the credit for our efforts.
“I became the expert, so I became indispensable to my team.” -Suzette Henry, Founder & Material Director, MLab
Men need to be part of the solution.
As someone who helped found a woman’s organization in Canada, I have to admit, I didn’t necessarily see the need for any men at our table. At first…
But what I realized over time was that, while Lean In Canada was a space for women to learn, connect and grow both personally and professionally, that didn’t mean men couldn’t be a part of the conversation. In fact, they should be part of the conversation. Because the uncomfortable truth is, we can’t make a difference if we leave 50% of the population out of the discussion. And if we want men on our side, we need them to understand our unique struggles, to empathize with them. The best way to do that? By inviting them to hear us speak, and by giving men who are making a difference a platform to be heard.
“Men must play an active role in this mission. Progress on gender equality requires participation from everyone, not just women.” -Justin Trudeau
So beginning in 2014, we committed to bringing these men in every November to speak about things like unconscious bias training, the importance of advocating for female colleagues, and promoting gender equality in the workplace and beyond. We heard from men like Andrew MacDougall, a Partner at Osler, Hoskin & Harcourt who wrote a report about getting more women on boards or in senior management positions. And when the Toronto Raptors’ Director of Basketball Operations, Courtney Charles, joined one of our panels, we discovered that his team is taking amazing strides for women’s equality.
It’s truly inspiring to be in the presence of men who share the same mission as Lean In Canada. The fact that these type of men exist—you know the “because it’s 2015” type of men—was a lesson learned for me.
Ask for what you want. Then ask again.
Do you know how we got Justin Trudeau to agree to do a video for one of our events? I reached out to Katie Telford, our prime minister’s chief of staff, and simply asked! As you might have imagined, she declined because Prime Minister Trudeau’s calendar was completely booked. At that point, it would have been easy to say “okay,” and move on. But instead, I made myself uncomfortable and suggested what I thought was a feasible alternative. And, as you can see from the video above, this time Katie responded with a ‘yes.’ Plus, she agreed to speak at a future Lean In Canada event. A few months later, we had a great turnout at our marquee event, “An Evening with Katie Telford.” (Double win!) Sad you missed it? Give it a watch here.
“Don’t take no for an answer.” -Shelli Baltman, President & Founder, The Idea Suite
Katie Telford
80% perfection is enough.
If you’re a perfectionist, this one can definitely be a lot more challenging than it sounds. It seems that women (more than men) strive to be the very best in all aspects of our lives: from career progression and motherhood, to the way we dress and the way we keep our homes, we’ve been conditioned to believe we need to be superwomen in order to succeed.
Psst, I’ve got a secret to share: 80% perfection is enough. (Thanks for the tip, Karlyn Percil!) Think about it, men will apply to a job if they are only 60% qualified for the position. Most women won’t apply unless they meet 100% of the requirements. Time to learn a lesson from the men: Let’s feel good enough—heck, pretty damned awesome!—at 80%. Because sometimes striving for perfection actually hinders us from getting the job done. Perfectionists, sit down for a minute. More often than not, done is better than perfect. And if, like me, that kind of makes you cringe, surround yourself with a team whose skills help create that perfect balance you are seeking.
“Let go of the notion of perfection! Take risks. Embrace the mess up.” -Janet Kestin and Nancy Vonk, Co-Founders, Swim
You are more capable than you think.
A final thought: No matter how imperfect we think we are, we are all more capable than we think. Just roll with it—even if you feel like you aren’t worthy of the invitation, promotion or accolade. That’s what I did when CBC Radio invited me to speak about Sheryl Sandberg’s “Ban Bossy” campaign back in 2014. I had never spoken on air before, and I felt hugely inadequate before being handed the mic. But you know what? I did it. And that led to me being approached by other large news organizations.
“Life peaks at the edge of your comfort zone.” -Joanna Griffith, Founder, CEO & Inventor, Knixwear
Embrace the uncomfortable, and you may just end up on national television. Or being asked to sit on a panel at Facebook headquarters. Or looking into our prime minister’s blue eyes. (Okay, that last one didn’t happen, but a girl can dream.)
I may have moved on to a new career in real estate, but I made sure to pack this lesson in my figurative suitcase before I left: Be comfortable with the uncomfortable.
I’ve got this. And so do you!
